Now that the dust has settled on the sexual harassment case filed by High Court secretary Andiswa Mengo against Eastern Cape Judge President Selby Mbenenge, I feel it is important to share my thoughts on the matter. This case highlights a crucial conversation about gender relations in South Africa, illuminating the complexities surrounding power dynamics, trust, and the pursuit of truth. It has become a pivotal moment for examining not only individual instances of misconduct but also the systemic factors that allow such issues to persist and thrive.
The gender wars that emerged on social media regarding this case compel us to reflect on the broader context of societal attitudes toward gender. While Mengo’s revelations that she may have lied about certain accusations complicate her case, they also reveal deeper systemic issues ingrained in our society. It is crucial to understand that false accusations, while damaging, do not diminish the real experiences of those who have suffered harassment and abuse. Instead, they underscore the urgent need for robust mechanisms that ensure accountability and support for survivors.
This country has a troubled legacy characterised by patriarchal violence and social norms that have long marginalised women. It is essential to approach allegations of this nature with a balanced perspective, recognising the context that shapes women’s lives in our country. The painful reality is that many South African women bear emotional scars from a lifetime of struggling against gender-based violence, betrayal by their partners, rejection, and the challenges of having absent fathers in their children’s lives. They also endure the difficulties of being single mothers. This collective trauma should act as a reflection of the systemic issues affecting women nationwide, stemming from a harsh historical context that influences both social and personal aspects of their lives.
Many women in South Africa are survivors of various forms of abuse, whether physical, emotional, or psychological. Various reports indicate that South Africa has one of the highest rates of gender-based violence globally. The consequences of this violence extend beyond individual trauma. They create an atmosphere of fear and mistrust within communities. When a woman is harmed, the impact ripples through her family, church, workplace, friends, and society, perpetuating a cycle of pain that increases vulnerability to hurt others. Tragically, those who suffer may sometimes become perpetrators themselves, leading to a continuous cycle of harm.
Confronting this reality requires empathy and a commitment to understanding the root causes of this pain. Recognising that “hurt people hurt others” is not an excuse but a call to action. We cannot remain passive observers as many women in South Africa engage in a daily battle for survival against a backdrop of entrenched inequalities. Economic disparities, inadequate access to education, and the lingering effects of apartheid are some of the factors that still entrap many individuals in cycles of disadvantage and abuse.
We urgently need a cultural change that redefines masculinity and encourages men to become partners in the fight against gender-based violence. Educating boys and young men about respect, consent, and the importance of healthy relationships can help foster a generation that rejects violence and embraces equality.
Understanding the cultural backgrounds that perpetuate male dominance is essential. From a young age, many boys from many cultures are taught to suppress vulnerability and express emotions only through aggression, while girls are taught to be harmonious and submissive. These unequal dynamics create an environment where misogyny and violence can thrive unchecked.
The ramifications of these behaviors extend beyond individual actions, manifesting in social structures like the workplaces that continue to marginalise women.
Ultimately, addressing the web of gender relations in South Africa requires a commitment to examining the cultural and societal narratives that have perpetuated these challenges. By working together to understand and address these underlying issues, we can hope to cultivate a more equitable and peaceful society for everyone.
Zenoyise John is a writer and communications strategist. She writes in her personal capacity.
